God

9th December 2013 11:20 A.M.

During every worship session I felt a different emotion.

And every time God was there. I found this amazing because it was a reminder of his presence. God was there and he always is, and he was trying to tell me. Sometimes it is only during particularly 'holy' times like these when I seek his presence. The truth is whether I bother to call for him or not, he never leaves and never would.

I guess that was why I felt a myriad of emotions throughout the camp. God needed to remind me urgently while he could because I'm so spiritually selfish, always giving a lot of time to things that aren't God. I knew this when I started to sit down while everyone still had their hands raised and mouths open. Holding my pen in one hand and my paper in the other, I began to write as God spoke:

"Love me for I am there even though you are frustrated. Love me because I am your comfort when you are sad. Love me because joy exists for you because I gave my son. I created a beautiful world for you, Sharmaine, and I want you to see it."

//

Back to why I felt a different emotion every night:

The first time I felt shamed because I was distracted and unable to connect to God while everyone else around me did. The second time I remembered my sins and I remembered the sorrows of the world. On the last night I remembered how I was going to Europe soon. I thought of the beautiful scenery, people, food and architecture. I thought of how I would soon get the rare chance to marvel at God's wonderful creations.

I needed to feel this because God needed to respond.

It is indeed timely and amazing that 'His Presence' was the theme of the camp because God was there and I know it. 

'Team'

Haven't posted in over a month.

I look at my blog and I realise how much happens in a month. 

Days. Weeks. Months. All add up to a year. It thus comprises a myriad of these kinds of moments - moments where you're on a roller coaster but you're not screaming. You're marveling at how fast it's going, how exciting it is. Yeah, that's me now. 

//

Babe, I'm dedicating this November post to you and to us.  

This afternoon we both received news about our OGL interviews being successful. It wasn't just getting through that made me happy. 

One of the quotes we've collected is: 'You take love and you multiply it.'

The team trophy's always bigger than the individual. Happiness gained from a team win is multiplied while solo happiness is just, singular. 

Ever since I was blessed with the chance of a lifetime to know you, happiness for me has been redefined. It comes in stronger; more powerful. And it demands to be celebrated. Every step we've taken together ever since we became a team needs to be celebrated.

And what do you know, we're about to take our newest, biggest step yet.

I highly doubt this will happen but I promise I will do something very embarrassing if you turn out to be my fellow OGL.

I don't usually post pictures but:

Each picture represents the steps we've taken together as a team. By the end of time, I'll need a million of these to celebrate all the steps we've taken together. 

I don't mind.

I love you.

My best friend

i have a best friend he is very sweet. yesterday my burfdae and he was oso very sweet.

Basically, my best friend's the most amazing guy I've ever met. He's literally like something out of a Korean drama or a Disney movie. And I don't even wish to compare him with all the princes and hot male leads because THEY aren't worthy. He's the kind of guy I used to doubt existed (but would still daydream about as a naive and stupid little girl anyway) and I was actually very, very sure I was right. But yesterday, I guess he decided it was time to shut me up once and for all. And that was pretty easy - even though I was adamant - considering the fact that my life is now the fairy tale all other young naive teenage girls just dream of having. Girls, if you want him for yourself, I don't blame you.

About God knows how long ago, my best friend started very mysteriously keeping his phone memo pad away from me. My best friend writes important things in his memo. And you'll know its very important when he keeps it locked with a password. Anyway, I briefly knew the reason why, but that was it. I obviously didn't want to ruin a surprise for myself. And here's the thing about me and surprises: I kind of hate them because who the hell decided that anyone should have to wait for good things?!?!? Then after I get surprised I start to kind of love them because who the hell am I to complain about having to wait?!

Here's another thing I'm quite sure about: most girls don't get surprised at 7 A.M. on a rooftop on their birthday by candles that spell out 'happy birthday', or by homemade muffins, or by a pendant with our picture and my name engraved on it. Or what about by devising an elaborate plan with my sister in secret for half a month just to surprise me and make sure that I will never forget how my seventeenth birthday ended? And girls love chick flicks. Girls wish they could be the Boys Over Flowers female lead receiving all these things. And they wish that despite knowing that such things don't come easy. Sometimes, they don't even come at all. So I'll admit it. I'm yet again 'one of those lucky girls' and I think saying that I'm an unbelievably, unquestionably, overly, genuinely, positively and absolutely lucky girl is a complete understatement. Even after all that said, I feel like I've yet to properly describe just how lucky I think I am. Best friend, maybe words aren't enough. So I would like to answer with a memory, yours to keep:

If the necklace was you asking me to be in your life forever, I'd say that my tears were my yes.

I used to think that tears of sadness are the kind you'd cry multiple times in a row. But to me, tears of joy - the kind you'd cry upon collecting O/A level results, or during an emotional 'haven't-seen-you-in-ages' reunion - were almost sacred. They're just these rare and mysterious little things; ghosts, kind of insignificant when they're not around, yet powerful, paralyzing and strangely stunning in attack. Not anymore though. My best friend intends to prove to me that ghosts are real. He redefines tears of joy. He sets the rules now. Best friend, very soon it'll be easy to say that you've redefined life. Or that you've redefined me. And best friend, I think you know very well:

We're redefining love everyday.

I don't even want to say thank you anymore because those are just two words. They're two words everyone tries to say differently on their own special day for the sake of it. It becomes an obligation and a practice. Best friend, if saying thank you is going to be an obligation, I don't want to. But that's barely going to mean anything compared to what I mean when I smile at you as though I've never known happiness, or when I cry as though I've never been moved. Best friend, what are you? Your existence almost seems impossible. But when I wake up everyday, the first thing that comes to mind is how real you are.

At this point it should be quite obvious that my best friend isn't actually my best friend. I just needed an easy way to write all of this and not have to stop myself because stinging is unthinkable when describing someone amazing like him. But what is he really? Honestly, I don't know. And I'm not sorry I don't know because I can't assign him a common label because this is an extraordinary guy in an extraordinary friendship. Girls, if you still want him for yourself, I don't blame you. If you've read this and you're now sure you need him for yourself, I still don't blame you. But back to the topic of not knowing - I do know now that if you want him for yourself, you'll have to get through me. Because I am irrevocably, crazily, devotedly, indescribably, so in love with my best friend, Su Jin Chandran.

Thank you for giving me the best birthday I could ever ask for
I love you ♥

Life-changing things discovered by Sharmaine #1

"Van Houten,

I’m a good person but a shitty writer. You’re a shitty person but a good writer. We’d make a good team. I don’t want to ask you any favors, but if you have time – and from what I saw, you have plenty – I was wondering if you could write a eulogy for Hazel. I’ve got notes and everything, but if you could just make it into a coherent whole or whatever? Or even just tell me what I should say differently.

Here’s the thing about Hazel: Almost everyone is obsessed with leaving a mark upon the world. Bequeathing a legacy. Outlasting death. We all want to be remembered. I do, too. That’s what bothers me most, is being another unremembered casualty in the ancient and inglorious war against disease.

I want to leave a mark.

But Van Houten: The marks humans leave are too often scars. You build a hideous minimall or start a coup or try to become a rock star and you think, “They’ll remember me now,” but (a) they don’t remember you, and (b) all you leave behind are more scars. Your coup becomes a dictatorship. Your minimall becomes a lesion.

(Okay, maybe I’m not such a shitty writer. But I can’t pull my ideas together, Van Houten. My thoughts are stars I can’t fathom into constellations.)

We are like a bunch of dogs squirting on fire hydrants. We poison the groundwater with our toxic piss, marking everything MINE in a ridiculous attempt to survive our deaths. I can’t stop pissing on fire hydrants. I know it’s silly and useless – epically useless in my current state – but I am an animal like any other.

Hazel is different. She walks lightly, old man. She walks lightly upon the earth. Hazel knows the truth: We’re as likely to hurt the universe as we are to help it, and we’re not likely to do either.

People will say it’s sad that she leaves a lesser scar, that fewer remember her, that she was loved deeply but not widely. But it’s not sad, Van Houten. It’s triumphant. It’s heroic. Isn’t that the real heroism? Like the doctors say: First, do no harm.

The real heroes anyway aren’t the people doing things; the real heroes are the people NOTICING things, paying attention. The guy who invented the smallpox vaccine didn’t actually invented anything. He just noticed that people with cowpox didn’t get smallpox.

After my PET scan lit up, I snuck into the ICU and saw her while she was unconscious. I just walked in behind a nurse with a badge and I got to sit next to her for like ten minutes before I got caught. I really thought she was going to die, too. It was brutal: the incessant mechanized haranguing of intensive care. She had this dark cancer water dripping out of her chest. Eyes closed. Intubated. But her hand was still her hand, still warm and the nails painted this almost black dark blue and I just held her hand and tried to imagine the world without us and for about one second I was a good enough person to hope she died so she would never know that I was going, too. But then I wanted more time so we could fall in love. I got my wish, I suppose. I left my scar.

A nurse guy came in and told me I had to leave, that visitors weren’t allowed, and I asked if she was doing okay, and the guy said, “She’s still taking on water.” A desert blessing, an ocean curse.

What else? She is so beautiful. You don’t get tired of looking at her. You never worry if she is smarter than you: You know she is. She is funny without ever being mean. I love her. I am so lucky to love her, Van Houten. You don’t get to choose if you get hurt in this world, old man, but you do have some say in who hurts you. I like my choices. I hope she likes hers."

The Fault In Our Stars - John Green

My amazing life so far

It's the last day of July, soon to be first day of August.

I guess I could have posted this any other day in July but since it's the last, I thought somehow it would be automatically more significant. 'The end of something always signifies the beginning of another' seems to be a very, very applicable phrase in my life right now, so applicable it's not even funny. Just within these six months A LOT has been ending, leading to A LOT beginning as well. Like, so many things it's not even funny. Guess you could say that it means I'm changing. Not 'changed', changing. I'm changing. It's happening quick and fast and it's scary. And everyday I get reminded of how much I'm changing. Don't get me wrong, it's not the terrifying-take-away-your-sleep kind of 'scary', it's more of the amazing, shocking, crazy, unfathomable and take-your-breath-away kind of feeling that lots of people lazily label 'scary'. Indeed, life right now for me is 'scary', but that's just another way for me to describe that even though I'm changing and life is changing, it's changing into something indescribably beautiful.

How I know myself and life are so obviously changing is when, firstly, I realised I've gotten used to it. I've gotten use to the old changes that now I've started feeling the new oncoming ones. My 'new school' is now just 'school', 'my new friends' are now just 'friends', everything new that I've been complaining about getting used to earlier in the year now feels completely normal. They've become new habits. It's kind of like this now - when I visit places that were once new to me, they feel like habits. When I visit places that were once my habits, they feel like memories. Things I talk about now make thoughts like "hey I've grown up" pop into my head every now and then. The change from secondary school to JC has transformed my lifestyle so much and 6 months into this new lifestyle the realisation hits me. And it hits me hard.

The heartwarming and perhaps beneficial thing about this change is that somehow, I'm embracing it. I'm enjoying it. It's been healthy for me. With the influx of so many new and exciting things happening, comes the influx of nostalgia as well. Everyday I tell stories of the 'good ol' days', sometimes I reminisce on my own, then the next thing I know I'm reliving them in the little spare time that I have. I've retained so much of my past, even though it's completely gone. And sometimes, although it's not possible, I try turning it into the present again. When that happens, convincingly, it seems like we're young again and nothing has changed. Anyway, the Whatsapp group (comprising only Celine and I) 'No. 51' still sees daily Whatsapp messages. 'Note #51' seems to be an ill-fitting description now, because it seems like we could write a book. And I think I'll soon be needing a chest for my box full of memories. I find it rather queer and interesting that I chose the night right before founders' day service to read the letters from Celine I've kept in my box since the last few years. I cried that night. And when something so random like that happens, it's hard not to think about it.

I realised, that night, how much I miss her. How much I miss the past. I thought I knew how much I did, but that's just what I thought. And so I guess it was time for me to know that well enough so that I wouldn't forget the importance of 25th July. And as major a thing the past is, so is the present. I've never seen myself so happy in years. This is coming from the girl that's originally really, really, really happy already. Like really. I didn't know it was humanly possible to be so happy. I didn't know feeling happy could be so limitless. And I didn't know I would be the lucky girl to get the chance to know that fact, today. Bob Marley's lyrics go "don't worry/about a thing/cos every little thing/is gonna be alright". Sometimes people sing songs because the tune just gets stuck up there. Nowadays, when I sing Bob Marley I sing it because I really mean it. I look forward to school everyday because people give me so much to look forward to. Su Jin Chandran serves fresh piping hot bullshit every single day, and I kindly fling just as much bullshit back. And that's just a naughty way to say that I like him. I like him a lot. And please stay in my life. Continue serving your bullshit that somehow magically gives me strength to survive each challenging day in our hellhole. I like all my classmates and teammates a lot too, heck, I even like people that make me sad and angry. You are the people that tone my face muscles. I also like the canteen stall aunties and uncles. But the sad thing is I will never ever ever have enough time to thank the people that make this happen. I just hope that I can show them what I mean by being the past they treasure, the present they're enjoying and the future they're creating. 

How to enjoy life the Sharmaine way - the step-by-step guide!

One of the things I enjoy doing is to enjoy life.

People often take notice of how I'm so full of energy all the time, how I'm always so happy, how small little setbacks don't get me down, how I love having fun and most importantly how I love making whatever life throws at me enjoyable. Sometimes they ask me, "how do you do it?" or "how are you so happy?" Well this blog post is about to reveal all my little tips and tricks hehe. And actually, it ain't even that hard. Just a precaution though - an overdose of my happiness potion can come with costly side-effects.

Step ONE: Have a buddy! Just one, two or a few is enough. Sometimes I feel that more may not exactly be merrier when you're talking about ten people or so. Outings for me are the most fulfilling when there are fewer people. It gives us more time and space to get personal with every single person present. And this makes for good and meaningful interactions between friends, which is one of the key things in enjoying life the right way! Another reason why it's so vital to have a buddy is because good things are just too good to be savoured alone. This is one thing I always tell my friends. Never enjoy the good stuff alone. Because if you do, you would have no one to share the goodness with and no one to share your thoughts and feelings with. A simple example would be K-pop fan-girls. Finding another fellow Shawol, Sone, Blackjack, VIP, whatever, means you have double the craziness, double the screaming and double the love. And admit it. This just makes you happier than you already are. And that, my friend, is exactly how you enjoy life.

Step TWO: FOOD. I can't even stress on how important it is for there to be food. There needs to be food. And how you go from living life to enjoying life is with GOOD FOOD. It can't be just food. And for what I call good food, I definitely won't be trying to squeeze that in here, because that deserves another post on its own. If you have the money go get some Royce dark chocolate. If you don't that's fine too. Get M&Ms, Kit Kat, no matter, it's chocolate! Also if you have the money, treat your buddy to a good buffet or something. If you don't, that's fine too. Go to your favourite famous Hawker Centre, station yourself at the stall with the longest queue (always go for the famous food), buy the smallest portion, so you can have space for even more. Remember chilli. Remember tau huay. Remember cold drinks. Oh and maybe one day you'd like to try sitting on the steps leading up to the hawker centre with some tau huay in hand. Don't ask so much, just try.

Step THREE: Late nights. It's difficult to relax and find peace and quiet in Singapore since it's a fast-paced city that just produces stressful people in stressful places in stressful situations. But that's understandable, it's a city. But anyway enjoying life also means making the most out of it. That's why despite how rare, late nights in Singapore can give you the peace and quiet you're searching for. You could follow my example: one time at around midnight, my sister and I were hungry, so we sneaked out of the house, bought snacks from the vending machine downstairs, sat by the pool in the quiet night and just talked. That's how you do it. Or you could start by grabbing a cold drink and looking at things outside you don't normally look at. Watch. Observe. You'd be surprised at how relaxing this is. Or make a hot milo, grab a phone and go make a long phone call. Make sure you talk about life. 

Step FOUR: Be crazy. Do crazy things. Do things you'd never imagine yourself doing. Take yourself places you'd never imagine yourself going. You'd love the feeling that accompanies this. Yesterday I went ice-skating, took me a couple minutes to befriend this group of Malay girls on the ice. All I asked was "can I join you?" and "what's your name?" and the next thing you know Su Jin, me and five other girls are linking hands and looking crazy on the ice. Go prank strangers! Prank your friends! Scare people! Laugh! Be happy! Go sit on the roller-coaster you always almost go on but never do! Like, stop being a pussy and just go kay. And one day you will find the courage to go on the tallest roller-coaster in the world and once you're done you will marvel at how the hell you found the courage to do that. When you're ready. Tell me. We'll go say hi to Six Flags New Jersey together. 

Step FIVE: Don't try so hard. You'd realise even the little things can make you happy. You'd realise the little things make you happier than all the other big things can. You'd realise you can make the most out of the little things. Like a big bucket of popcorn, your favourite drink, your favourite movie, your favourite song. And when you eat your favourite food, don't just eat your favourite food. Appreciate the taste, the flavour, the smell. When you drink your favourite drink, don't just drink it. Put plenty of ice-cubes in it, make sure you feel refreshed, because when you do it means it's a good drink. The same concept goes for movies, books, songs, whatever. It's just a habit for me to imagine, think and reflect on everything about movies, books and songs. Make them come to life in your head, appreciate everything about them. 

And this is how you make the most out of everything, no matter what it is, no matter how small, no matter where you are, no matter who you're with. This is.... the Sharmaine way to enjoy life. Worth a shot isn't it? ;)

Memories

Last Sunday, I went to Orchard Road.

No no, this is not going to be about the trendy clothes I bought or the atas food I had. This wouldn’t be named “memories” otherwise.

It often becomes difficult to appreciate things of our past when everything is new, when everything is changing and when everything is becoming increasingly modern. We are so used to having the world at a swipe of a screen, that we forget how primitive and simple things used to be. We forget how pagers, colourless Nokias, Tamagotchis and so on – fragments of our past, used to exist but are now gone, lost. 

So anyway, last Sunday, even as I walked the bright glittery streets overcrowded with branded goods stores, I couldn’t help but take notice of this one little thing that stood out to me – the Marigold ice-cream push cart, the most basic form of an ice-cream store, the epitome of childhood happiness and memories. At least it used to be.

As a child I remember getting overly excited at the distant ringing of the ice-cream bell and the sight of an orange umbrella attached to a puny motorcycle out my window. It is things like that make my childhood memories worthy of sharing and worthy of remembering. Thus came the fear of the ice-cream push cart and the memories along with it disappearing into history.

Our precious memories, oh our poor sad memories.

But as we helplessly watch the symbols of our memories slowly deplete and diminish as time passes, maybe we could make a difference by putting effort into making great memories and treasuring them. And I think it is apt for to say that as a J1, I (and you too) can start doing just that, since we’re in a new school, with these new friends and in this new time. Let us make some great memories that at least won’t disappear even as the objects around them slowly do.

And here is a picture of a place that holds good memories for me (but sadly, gone). What’s yours?

A wonderful friendship

Sometimes I think I really am the luckiest girl in the whole world.

Over the past few weeks, I have been developing a lovely friendship right here in ACJC. And as more weeks go by, it’s just becoming lovelier and lovelier. Every week just comes with more sweetness, more surprises and more fun. Whenever something great happens to me, I always wonder if there’s anything that could be greater. I am proud to say that my growing friendship with my one special classmate has now set a new record. He wasn’t the first person I talked to. Neither was he the first person I imagined would make such a huge impact on me. I also happened to want to spend school keeping a safe distance from him. Then last night I realised, oh, this was another one of those things again isn't it, the surprises. And for some reason, surprises just make everything seemingly normal not at all ordinary anymore.  So what have I gotten out of my first two months really? One hell of a friendship. ;)

If I were to sum up our friendship in one word, the word has seriously got to be 'crazy'. It's literally crazy in a sense that we do crazy things together - the first was me asking him to do 20 pushups in the middle of Tanjong Pagar station. And then there's other things like him asking me to say 'I love you' to every random stranger I walk past. And me daring him to going up to a random guy in school saying 'you're hot ;)'. There was also the time where my classmates and I buried him in sand and gave him boobs and a dick made out of sticks and sand. And soon I'll be getting him to dance right smack in the middle of the school field while I sit there watching and cheering. And getting him to race with me at Luge. And there's more - photobombing tourists and every other person, sitting at the steps of the hawker centre and just talking, I gave him a cupcake facial, we threw cake at each other, I throw chocolate down his shirt, we throw stuff at each other, we poke each other, I draw on his arm, I trash him at dance central..............

Now it's also crazy because while we're having this much fun all the time (seriously, all the time): it's very sweet. We've made it a thing to meet at the bleachers every morning and sit together during assembly. And yesterday was the conclusion of my 10 day project where I treat him to sweet things everyday for 10 days. It's also intimate. We are still able to have the most meaningful conversations. Those never ending kinds, the kinds where we just never ever ever run out of things to say. I always say that these kinds are the ones about 'life'. ;) I think it has come to a point where it feels like we're having just one loooooooooonnngggggg conversation with an end that's yet to be determined. And something tells me that it's gonna take a long time before I know when that end is. Then again, something else tells me that maybe that's because there won't even be an end. 

Me

A very long 'About me'

Written on 16 January 2013
In a car and massage parlour

My name is Sharmaine Yeo Sze Min. I like my name because it is different from Shermaine or Charmaine. It represents me well. I'm sixteen going seventeen. 157 centimetres tall. 45.5 kg heavy. Physically I'm your normal average person even though I try not to be (appearance wise). My favourite type of food is Japanese because I enjoy the fish the Japanese eat and squishy noodles. At the same time I enjoy anything spicy but I hate anything too spicy. I have a sweet tooth. Which has been bad for my face. I enjoy writing and reading a lot. Ironically I also enjoy sports a lot. All kinds, in fact. In my free time, I enjoy baking as much as I enjoy eating what I bake. I enjoy YouTube too much than I actually should. Facebook and Twitter is boring but visiting such sites is a habit. I enjoy shopping a little too much. I enjoy eating and enjoy enjoying life as much. Ironically, I love the Xbox and FPS games. The Kinect is an okay form of exercise. Effective. I like Glee, Korean dramas and the "Top Model" franchise. I also love watching Tennis. Grand slams baby! That's about all the things I watch on TV. And judging from the things I like, I guess I love being both girly and boyish.

While there's an end to the things I currently like, there's no end to the things I want to like. So, I like new things. Eating new things, trying new things, doing new things. New people, new places, new activities, new environments. That doesn't mean I don't like to be old-fashioned once in awhile. My weirdest habits are movie making and doing gigs in the shower. The weirdest part of my body is my butt. It's green. I like pig intestines and that's not weird. I love being entertained. By music, by books and by movies. I enjoy music. Rarely, I enjoy the music people don't call music. I think Kpop can be good. So don't deny it. Big Bang has been too good. A good beat works for me. So does a guitar accompanying a lovely voice. I like feeling obsessed about talent, or someone who has talent because I appreciate a good voice. R.I.P to the good singers with good voices - Michael Jackson and Whitney Houston and more. Big Bang, I am so going to your concert one day. I promise myself and God. And yes, I am a Christian and proud to be one.

I appreciate a good story, regardless of whether they're on print or screen. My favourite books are the Percy Jackson series. And Rick Riordan is a genius. My favourite movies are Disney's Tangled and James Cameron's Avatar. I feel that Disney Pixar cooks up a mean movie. I don't only like one genre of music of books or movies. Any genre is good if the story is meaningful and thought-provoking. I have friends - not too many, not too little. I'd like to use a better word than 'nice' to describe them but I'm afraid I have to use it anyway. They are nice. The nicest is my best friend, Celine. I have a family, and they're nice too. And I'm afraid I can't single out the nicest family member although I could single out my sister, Shevonne. In summary, the ones I love deserved to be loved. And although everyone says this, I have to say it anyway. I have the best family and friends in the www (whole wide world).

Don't ask me to describe my personality in 'a few' words, it's too difficult. My strongest trait is tenacity. I think I have mostly emotional tenacity. I think I have physical tenacity too. My weakest trait is absent-mindedness. I am weird in the sense that I may look absent-minded but am actually looking around and wondering. And thinking. I like thinking about the reasons behind everything. 'Why is there static electricity?' has been my most recent question. This is what triggers me to write. I'm able to write well with inspiration, which could be almost anything. And I just discovered I love food that's crispy on the outside but soft and chewy on the inside. And beef. Sorry for going off-topic, it happens. Cos I'm a girl.

I don't love studying, but I don't hate it either. I honestly prefer having fun. I only study when it's seriously time to. So that's why I guess, studying has been okay to me so far. My favourite subject is math, although my PSLE and 'O' level results say otherwise. I hate humanities. My 'O' level results say otherwise. I don't like memorising Biology. My 'O' level results don't say otherwise. Forming good relationships is something that means a lot to me. I treasure a good relationship involving a good person. And I think good relationships can only exist with good communication. A good person to me has basic morals and shares things. A person I wouldn't like is someone unhygienic, inconsiderate, proud and self-righteous. I mix well with people who go beside me, rather than in front of me. People who talk about life are good too. The perfect guy to me (appearance wise) is Lee Min Ho.

Anyway, I hope I haven't been boring up to this point. I'm about to finish. Just let me declare some random things. I go crazy at night. I cry at movies. I like responsibilities. I like giving advice. I love my mother a lot. I love feeling loved. I love making people smile. And I like going through hardship because I like gaining experience. I hate people who force beliefs on me. I hate bad music. I hate to see my loved ones being bullied. I can be nice, I can be nasty. And I hope I've been nice, and reading this has been nice for you. Writing it has been nice too. Thank you for having enough interest in me to read up to this point. I just wonder why I have this much patience to write this much. I must really love writing.

One last thing - I'm Sharmaine Yeo, I'm strong, bubbly and happy-go-lucky. I have cried, lied and sighed. I'm not the best person in the www. I can be wrong even though I prefer to be right. Who I am isn't someone great like leader Barrack Obama, sportsman Roger Federer or legend Bruce Lee. I will NEVER be great like them, but one day, I hope to be great in my own way. I've got to say, I'm happy enough with who I am and I thank God for letting me be me.

Now I have a question for you - are YOU happy with who you are?

"One can only love others when he loves himself" - Me, I think

End